This F&%#ing Diet Sucks!!!

Okay so I have established that I went from" oh-so-cute-I-wanna-marry-you" to " yes, we know you are now the size of a moose, but you gotta send us pictures in your undies." I have been on the south beach diet before, but I did it half-heartedly to squeeze this enormous cuban behind of mine in my wedding dress. I decided I was going to give it a go again since I am determined to have this procedure done in April. For those of you who don't know the SBD is consists of eliminating sugar, bad carbs, sugar, fruit, sugar, eliminating sugar - Get the drift? The diet is divided into three Phases. The first Phase lasts two weeks and is designed to eliminate cravings and kick-start weight loss. The second Phase is intended to produce long-term, steady weight loss. You'll stay in Phase 2 until you reach a healthy weight. Then you'll move to Phase 3, the lifestyle Phase...blah, blah, blah.

So I was all set. I had all my healthy goodies and I AM GOING TO DO THIS! I started on Sunday the 17th and was hanging in there doing good. I got on the scale on wednesday and found I had gone from 249 to 244. Not bad for a few days. I was on roll! Then I found the swiss rolls. You know you love swiss rolls. I turned the other way, tried to forget they were in the cabinet and made myself a cup of hot tea with (ugh) splenda.

So the next day I get on the scale and it says 242. AWESOME!!! Yes, I am awesome. I beat the swiss rolls!! Ha Ha, in your face! Doing good. I've been steaming my veggies, eating lean meats, not fats, no sweets. The next day Mike and I go to the movies. Now I will not pay full price to go to the movies. The cost of going out to the movies nowadays is just ridiculous especially if you have a bunch of kids. Luckily, we have the Merrillville 10 near us where we only pay 5 dollars for adults for the night show and they are all newly released movies. We decide to see The Princess and The Frog. Good movie by the way. Here's the clincher: They give you a free small bag of popcorn with one free refill with your ticket. Now, I looooovvvvveeee movie popcorn. It's so yummy and so much better than microwave popcorn. Question is what is that "butter" that they put on it really? Doesn't matter cause that's the best part! So I made my decision to accept that free small bag of popcorn and I loved it. I did not use the free refill option.

Saturday, I get on the scale 242. Good.

Sunday, I get on the scale 245..... WHAT!!!!!! You can't tell me that one little itty bitty bag of popcorn on Friday made me gain 3 pounds. The scale and I get into a fight. I just want to throw it out the damn front door and let the electronic wiring die a slow painful death out in the cold. Stupid scale!!! Errrrr!!! I'm not happy. I have been following this diet all week to the T with the exception of my beloved popcorn and this...this thing is mocking my efforts! Whatever. I ignore it the rest of the day.

Today, Monday I get on the scale 246.... I stop and think for a minute. Let me see. I step on it again 242....hmmmmmm. I step on it again 247. Damn thing needs to be recalibrated. LOL. Whew!!

And so I went to the weight management doctor today and stepped on their scale 242. Awesome. I will not step on any other scale from here on out.